Transcript
"Hey, it's Abel calling. I hope you were able to patch up some of those network vulnerabilities we were having earlier. I'm stuck here in Washington running some sort of apology tour, for the foreseeable future unfortunately. [sighs] It's a fucking PR nightmare. Apparently creating a simulated version of Heaven has everyone up to and including the Pope clutching their pearls. I don't see what the big goddamn deal is, at least our version is definitively provable. I mean, if anything I'm more pro-life than any of these fuckin' assholes. [sighs] Anyway, I'm rambling. I need your help with something important, like Priority One, and I'd really rather not discuss it over voicemail? So... yeah, answer your damn phone. I'll be giving you another ring here shortly if I don't hear back from you in like ten minutes. Alright? Call me back. You know the number."
Transcript
"Hey, just following up here because I haven’t heard from you yet and you’re making me kind of nervous. I don’t know if I said this in my last message, but this is extremely important - like “paramount for the well-being of our jobs” important. I’m trusting you with a lot here and it has specifically to do with World άλφα. And this does not leave this conversation, do you understand me? We shouldn’t even be talking about it over voicemail, which again, if you’d answer your fucking phone, we wouldn’t be in this position in the first place. Listen, I need you to access something remotely for me; my hands are tied up halfway across the country. You’ve got five minutes to call me back or it’s your ass."
Transcript
"Let me just get something straight here - I never liked you. As far as I'm concerned, you were some kind of pity hire that got in just because of your dad. [sighs] Now that's out of the way, you have an opportunity to make me hate you a little bit less. I need you to do something for me that may or may not put your job into jeopardy. As your boss, that is a risk I am willing to take.
What I say now does not leave this conversation, and you forget everything you've heard about this after you've completed it. I know during your orientation that it was repeatedly stressed that you do NOT touch World άλφα by any means necessary; that for all intents and purposes, it does not exist. That was, and still is, very good advice. However, as your boss, I'm going to ask you to carefully break that rule because time is a little critical right now. I know this might come as some kind of surprise to you, but an enormously successful cutting-edge tech juggernaut might just happen to have one or two little skeletons in its closet. Something's gone horribly wrong in World άλφα and what happens to that will have a cascading effect on the rest of the hosted worlds. Every iteration of the sites and the systems we have built up for Eternity Project have been built on top of this legacy code.
Right, I'm going to give you the credentials to the old system administrator's account meant for only accessing World άλφα. This can only be done on a local machine connected to the network, otherwise I'd do it here and not depend on some kind of proverbial code monkey. [sighs] Now let me say in no uncertain terms here that this is a legacy account, built on legacy code that is just about as old as you are. I can count the people that vaguely still know how it works on one hand. Do not touch anything you're not supposed to. Follow my instructions very carefully.
You're going to go to the main website, and you're going to type the following slug into the URL: /sysadmin5-alpha-backdoor and hit Enter. If it works, you should be prompted for a password. You're going to want to type wthnhbrs12. If that works, you'll see a nasty error message, just be patient. There should be a button somewhere to proceed after a few seconds. You'll have to find it, it's not always readily available. If you find it, click it. That should take you into the bootable for World άλφα. The password there is MnchldrnA11. You need to be careful about this because the system will lock you out after too many attempts.
[sighs] Okay, now here is the tricky part. You need- I can’t believe I’m trusting you with this, alright. [clears throat] Now you should be staring at the metaphorical heart of World άλφα. There should be an option to inject a text file directly into the database. It needs to be a basic text file with the correct - I cannot stress this enough - the correct parameters. If you overload the server with the wrong information, you’re liable to fry the entire thing or at least severely screw things up. You’re going to have to write the bit of code yourself and then manually inject it. In the past, when I’ve had to run maintenance cycles on it, I just used .txt files. You’ll have to upload the right file with the right text for this ancient thing to parse through and hit submit. Once you do, give it a second and it should upload to the server. Unfortunately, you’re not going to know the results immediately so you better pray to God that you got it right. If you’re too hasty and you go around clicking things without knowing what they do, you’re liable to have the opposite effect here.
Okay, I am counting on you more than I want to. I’m hoping that you get this right. If not? Dude, if you fuck this up, I might have just enough time to come and kill you before they end up killi- [voicemail ends]"
"Alright. Well, I don't know what you did, but at least the immediate crisis is over. I'm checking on my end now, I- hang on. [typing sounds] Okay, we- okay. If that's the route you want to go. Not the direction I would've taken at this point, but I guess those are both equally valid options if we're going to get another chance to stabilize things at World άλφα. I still think it's possible and worthwhile to save it and I know at this point I'm probably one of the only ones. There are people stuck in there after all. I just wouldn't feel comfortable condemning them to die if there was a chance they could be saved. Let's see what happens when the game comes back online. I hope to God this works."
